Big Cait

I just had to do this.

Big Cait

Ev’ry mornin’ at the gym you could see her arrive

She stood six foot two and weighed one eighty-five

Kinda broad at the shoulder and narrow at the hip

And everybody knew, she was swingin’ a dick, Big Cait

Nobody seemed to know what Cait wanted to be

If two genders ain’t enough, hell, we’ll make three

So you didn’t say much 'cause you knew she was a guy

And if you spoke at all, you just said, “Hi” to Big Cait

She still looks like a man, t’was written in her genes

Couldn’t make up his mind if she's a King or a Queen

And a big endorsement from a reality show

Sent her back into the spotlight with a lotta dough, Big Cait

He weren't always a Cait, he used to be a Bruce
But one way or another his wiring got loose
It screwed up his thinking, his mind was a mess
So he decided to fix it by wearing a dress, Big Cait

It makes it real hard while writing this verse
Cause the gender thing keeps running in reverse
Now she's a woman but first he's a man
And I'm handling this as best as I can, for Big Cait

Now Brucelyn's future is up in the air
What she's got planned, I don't really care
But a slashing blow from a surgeon's right  hand
Could send Brucelyn's balls into a stainless steel pan, Big Cait

There will come a day at the end of his life

When God’s gonna settle all this identity strife

He made you a man and that’s what you gotta be

And you’ll pay for all this nonsense throughout eternity

Big Cait