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April 13, 2011

Miranda Warnings For Zucchinis?

The nut cases are in charge of the asylum. They want to give ants, grasshoppers, snakes, pelicans and rhubarb the same rights as human beings.
UNITED NATIONS — Bolivia will this month table a draft United Nations treaty giving "Mother Earth" the same rights as humans — having just passed a domestic law that does the same for bugs, trees and all other natural things in the South American country.
The bid aims to have the UN recognize the Earth as a living entity that humans have sought to "dominate and exploit" — to the point that the "well-being and existence of many beings" is now threatened.

The wording may yet evolve, but the general structure is meant to mirror Bolivia's Law of the Rights of Mother Earth, which Bolivian President Evo Morales enacted in January.

18 comments:

LL said...

The next time I see you kick a pebble, Sig94, I'm going to place you under citizen's arrest for aggravated assault and will lodge you at the nearest graybar hotel until transportation can be arranged for your extradition to Bolivia...

sig94 said...

LL - as pebbles are juvvie rocks, I most likely will recieve the death penalty. Except that the hemp plant that provides the material for the rope must first be offered the opportunity to be reimbursed for the loss of stalk. Since hemp are all greedy bastards, they'll refuse and submit a much higher counter offer.

By time negotiations break down and they sue for binding arbitration, I'll be in the ground anyway. Then the worms can sue the maggots for the drilling privileges to my withered bony ass.

Zio Rico said...

Salad? I call it veggie rape.

Nickie Goomba said...

My Burmese Digging Hound has fleas. Whose rights do I defend? Dog or bug? Or am I supposed to not get involved?

sig94 said...

Zio - we all know about you and those baby carrots...

fuzzys dad said...

Yipes this means if I kill the moles in my yard i could face the Death Penalty for it.

sig94 said...

Nickie - The fleas are considered refugees who were driven from other hounds. Therefore, per UN regulations, part of your Hound must be partitioned for the fleas. From now on there will be East Burmese Digging Hound and West Burmese Digging Hound. The fleas will have East Burmese Digging Hound and will receive assistance from the UN. The West Burmese Digging Hound will not receive any funding as there are no refugees situated there. There will be a narrow "No Flea Zone" enforced between the two partitiions.

sig94 said...

FuzzyD - the UN is establishing a camp with military tribunals for offenders such as you. The judges will be drawn from each of the five major food groups.

Kid said...

We should be fined each time we step on the Earth.

They Say/We Say said...

Gaea/Athena = Mother Earth! Check it out.
Amendment I.
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion...
The KEY WORD is Respecting.

The meaning-concerning/about.

If this is to be a U.N. resolution, this will be the grounds to force the Congress to GET OUT OF THE U.N.
PERIOD---NO DEBATE!

Also if this is not brought up to the Congress about the EDU brainwashing our children in mother earth day/earth day, or such--no one has the right to gripe about the Congress anymore!
I say it all the time-but if the number of complaints increase ***X and blows their phone lines--they will take notice. Fax-email etc...

Doom said...

I can't wait until the lawyers descend on that nation. There will be nothing left BUT crickets and lawyers. As my grandfather never told me but should have, never invite, develop, initiate, create, or feed a swarming insect such as lawyers. Then again, look what they have done for the American Indian! Cheers.

Atlanta Roofing said...

Bolivia will this month table a draft United Nations treaty giving “Mother Earth” the same rights as humans — having just passed a domestic law that does the same for bugs, trees and all other natural things in the South American country.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

This ties very well into your last post. I am surprised that California hasn't beat em to it though.

sig94 said...

Kid - go to your room. You just gave Commodore Moonbeam of the Asparagus Grand Fleet a brilliant idea.

sig94 said...

TSWS - the UN Turtle Bay complex should be left as Berlin was on May 8, 1945. Please pay your parking tickets on the way out or be shot.

sig94 said...

Doom -
"swarming attorneys"
"courthouse feeding frenzy"
"litigious obsessive/compulsive"
"Trial Lawyers Anal Sex Association"

my blood runs cold.

sig94 said...

Atlanta - echo? Come on, jump in!

sig94 said...

Odie - this was like a gift.