December 31, 2011


Theallet, des Garcons - you got designer clothes on
Rodriguez, Toledo -  thank God you don't wear Speedos 
Panichgul, Narciso - no need to pay as you go
To Honolulu

On a Hawaiian beach
Lays the nation’s biggest leech
That's where you wanna go to sun and drink Boudreaux

That big ass in the sand
Takes forever to get sun tanned
But there's no hurry! Go slow!
Four million bucks you will blow
Down in Honolulu

Theallet, des Garcons - you got designer clothes on
Rodriguez, Toledo -  thank God you don't wear Speedos 
Panichgul, Narciso - no need to pay as you go
Down to Honolulu

You got there fast
Air Force One you flew
That’s what you wanted to do
Way down in Honolulu

No Plantation Estate, the reservation was too late.

First Wookie sits by the sea
While her husband sets up to tee
And the Muslims romp so merrily

It is quite a sight
That giant ass of yours in the sunlight
It’s just like a frigging total eclipse
When the sun’s behind your hips
Way down in Honolulu

Theallet, des Garcons - you got designer clothes on
Rodriguez, Toledo -  thank God you don't wear Speedos 
Panichgul, Narciso - no need to pay as you go
Down to Honolulu

You got there fast
Air Force One you flew
That’s what you wanted to do
Way down in Honolulu

Now here's the real deal:

Hopefully the 2012 tide will also wipe away the current administration!

December 30, 2011

Why I Carry

Written almost six years ago, the Munchkin Wrangler delivers a most excellent essay on the utility of firearms in establishing a civil and safe society:

Human beings only have two ways to deal with one another: reason and force. If you want me to do something for you, you have a choice of either convincing me via argument, or force me to do your bidding under threat of force. Every human interaction falls into one of those two categories, without exception. Reason or force, that's it.

In a truly moral and civilized society, people exclusively interact through persuasion. Force has no place as a valid method of social interaction, and the only thing that removes force from the menu is the personal firearm, as paradoxical as it may sound to some.

When I carry a gun, you cannot deal with me by force. You have to use reason and try to persuade me, because I have a way to negate your threat or employment of force.

The gun is the only personal weapon that puts a 100-pound woman on equal footing with a 220-pound mugger, a 75-year old retiree on equal footing with a 19-year old gang banger, and a single guy on equal footing with a carload of drunk guys with baseball bats. The gun removes the disparity in physical strength, size, or numbers between a potential attacker and a defender.

There are plenty of people who consider the gun as the source of bad force equations. These are the people who think that we'd be more civilized if all guns were removed from society. But, a firearm makes it easier for an armed mugger to do his job. That, of course, is only true if the mugger's potential victims are mostly disarmed either by choice or by legislative fiat - it has no validity when most of a mugger's potential marks are armed.

People who argue for the banning of arms ask for automatic rule by the young, the strong, and the many, and that's the exact opposite of a civilized society. A mugger, even an armed one, can only make a successful living in a society where the state has granted him a force monopoly.

Then there's the argument that the gun makes confrontations lethal that otherwise would only result in injury. This argument is fallacious in several ways. Without guns involved, confrontations are won by the physically superior party inflicting overwhelming injury on the loser.

People who think that fists, bats, sticks, or stones don't constitute lethal force, watch too much TV, where people take beatings and come out of it with a bloody lip at worst. The fact that the gun makes lethal force easier, works solely in favor of the weaker defender, not the stronger attacker. If both are armed, the field is level.

The gun is the only weapon that's as lethal in the hands of an octogenarian as it is in the hands of a weight lifter. It simply would not work as well as a force equalizer if it wasn't both lethal and easily employable.

When I carry a gun, I don't do so because I am looking for a fight, but because I'm looking to be left alone. The gun at my side means that I cannot be forced, only persuaded. I don't carry it because I'm afraid, but because it enables me to be unafraid. It doesn't limit the actions of those who would interact with me through reason, only the actions of those who would do so by force. It removes force from the equation--and that's why carrying a gun is a civilized act.

Set Toothbrushes On "Stun"

The toothbrush of the future may surprise you.
Some background, for anyone who doesn't subscribe to Dentistry Illustrated Weekly: the plasma brush isn't a toothbrush, but actually a tool dentists are hoping to use for two primary situations. The first is breaking up plaque; the plasma torch, though it's no hotter than room temperature, is excellent at breaking the bonds that adhere plaque to a tooth. The second is as a sort of primer for filling cavities.

There are certain kinds of cavities, according to Hao Li, associate professor of mechanical and aerospace engineering in the Missouri University University of Missouri College of Engineering, that need to be refilled every five or seven years using current technology--and they can only be refilled a few times before having to be pulled. The plasma brush can prime a cavity for filling in sort of the same way pavers create those divots in roads before filling them in with new asphalt: it provides more surface area for the filling to stick to, and the research team claims plasma-assisted fillings could be 60% stronger than traditional fillings.

December 29, 2011

The Duck Of Windsor He Ain't

The Duck of Palma and his bride, Infanta Christina de Espana

The son-in-law of King Carlos of Spain is now a person of interest in an embezzlement investigation, according to Spanish authorities.
Inaki Urdangarin, 43, a former Olympic athlete who carries the title Duke of Palma, will face court as part of an investigation into accusations that a non-profit organisation he ran was siphoning off funds from the regional government of the Balearic Islands – Majorca, Menorca, Ibiza and Formentera.
For the record, any woman of royal birth whose name is Infanta Christina has absolutely no business marrying anyone named Erkle.
The Noos Institute, which the duke ran from 2004 to 2006, is accused of misusing millions of euros in public funds.
Oh noes! Not the Noos?!?!
The case has made the front pages of Spanish newspapers for weeks, but a judge's decision to name Mr Urdangarin as a formal suspect took the scandal to a new level.

The former handball player, who is married to King Juan Carlos's younger daughter, Princess Cristina, will have to appear in court in Palma, the capital of Majorca, on Feb 6.
And this was the magic that sealed the deal for her... he played Olympic handball?

Hmmm -excuse me Your Royal Highness, I'd like to introduce you to Mr. Palms of Steel!

So, who is Erkle and what does he do? According to Forbes, he is from Sao Paolo, Brazil:
Inaki Urdangarin is 42 years old and serves as a member of our Board of Directors. Mr. Urdangarin is a former world-class professional handball player. He has also participated in three Olympic Games, winning medals in two of them (1996 and 2000), and is Spain's most decorated sportsman accumulating significant sporting achievements, and especially the affection of many fans across Europe. He held the important role of Vice-President of the Spanish Olympic Committee. He combined competitions with studies of Business Science.
If he played hockey I could understand her attraction.
After ending his sporting career, he began advanced management studies in ESADE, one of the most prestigious business schools in the world. Currently, he is a professor of business policy at ESADE. He has also developed a professional career as an advisor and consultant at La Caixa (a major Spanish financial firm) and Octagon, before he co-founded the Noos Institute, where he was the president until 2006...
...when he decided to tap into the fruit of the Institute.

Okay, okay, I agree. He is innocent until proven guilty. But for a Court to bring a member of the royal family under suspicion there has to be more than a handful, or palmful, of evidence implicating the Duck.

The Duck is being investigated for billing regional governments over 5 million euros for organizing sporting events and then diverting the funds to companies controlled by his associates.

More from Forbes:
Sustainable development and social integration have been some of the priority areas in which Mr. Urdangarin has developed his own professional activities for Telefónica. His sports, academic and professional experience makes him believe in the power of sports and culture as useful tools for social inclusion. He, together with other relevant sportsmen, international academics and CEOs, developed a foundation to study and promote the use of sports and culture to help those in danger of being socially excluded.
He's guilty as sin! Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!
Anyone who makes a living from the Society For The Prevention of Danger of Social Exclusion has to be stealing someone blind.

Here's Spain's royal family. That's the Duck on the right.

December 28, 2011

Kim Jung-Il: A Creepy Dictator Gets A Creepy Funeral

These people act like it's Kim Kennedy-King-Ghandi-il being buried, not Kim Jong-il, a crackpot dictator who literally starved an entire nation. He had an army of 1.2 million in a country that has only 8.3 million men between the ages of 15 and 64. That's like 25% of all men of military age in the country were in the armed services. If America had armed services that large it would be almost 20 million.

Because this goof's father was named "Eternal President" Kim Jung-il was never actually the President of North Korea. He was known by many titles, the General Secretary of the Workers' Party of Korea, Chairman of the National Defence Commission of North Korea, and the supreme commander of the Korean People's Army and simply "Supreme Leader" - but not President.

The last time I saw people cry like this was when my grandfather died and a bunch of sobbing bookies threw themselves on his coffin.

December 26, 2011

Things To Do In Russia

Starving In North Korea's Fatherland

Apparently in North Korea common sense has gone the way of the 2,000 calorie minimum dietary requirement. Or else they're democrats.

Magpies mourn, are you listening?
In North Korea, tears are glistening.
He had a great ride, but Kim Jong-il has died.
Starving in North Korea's Fatherland.

The world may say we're over-acting
Our Blessed Leader they're detracting;
We're all in lip sync 'cause his shit didn't stink
Starving In North Korea's Fatherland.

Since he's dead we'll build a mausoleum
Make the sucker sixty stories high.
We'll bow before his lazy son Kim Jung-un
And kiss his wrinkled ass before we die.

Later on we'll be sneaking,
A grain of rice while we're weeping.
The revolt's undeclared 'cause we're just too damned scared!
Starving In North Korea's Fatherland.