He's Gonna Need Much Bigger Feet

I always got a chuckle when the kids used to play "grown up" by wearing an adult's shoes.

Suddenly it ain't so funny.


Cartoon by Scott Stantis/Chicago Tribune.

The Sorcerer's Appendix

From the UK Guardian:

Ahmadinejad allies charged with sorcery
Iranian power struggle between president and supreme leader sees arrests and claims of undue influence of chief of staff

Close allies of Iran's president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, have been accused of using supernatural powers to further his policies amid an increasingly bitter power struggle between him and the country's supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei.

This all started when the Ayatollah was afflicted with severe flatulence during Ramadan. One of his wives remarked that the Ayatollah's ass smelled like Ahmadinejad's speeches and it all went to hell from there.

Several people said to be close to the president and his chief of staff, Esfandiar Rahim Mashaei, have been arrested in recent days and charged with being "magicians" and invoking djinns (spirits).

They must also be close to our President and sharing Obumble's special White House blend of Moroccan Ice Hash. You can't make this stuff up unless you're on meds or hallucinogens.

Ayandeh, an Iranian news website, described one of the arrested men, Abbas Ghaffari, as "a man with special skills in metaphysics and connections with the unknown worlds".

Translation, "He refused to be the Ayatollah's shower buddy." Special skills, yeah, okay, right ... whatever.

And these mooks are developing nuclear weapons...

Vindication

From the National Review Online. By Jim Geraghty.

In case the font is too small, the words at the bottom are: “VINDICATION:
When the loudest critic of your policies achieves his greatest success because
of them.”

I can hear the liberal cries of outrage, so to recap: The interrogations of KSM (which included waterboarding) and the interrogation of Hassan Ghul (held in “black site” prisons) were key to identifying the courier; the president then authorized military action in a foreign country without going to the United Nations or informing the host government; the military action was unilateral, and we did not consult with our allies; Congress was not informed of the military action; and it increasingly appears that no serious effort was made to treat Osama bin Laden as a criminal (reading him his rights, etc.). The monitoring of Abu Ahmed al-Kuwaiti’s phone call was a result of an extensive global wiretapping system. Furthermore, as Charles Krauthammer notes, the helicopters used in the raid came from Bagram and Jalalabad; if we had withdrawn from Afghanistan on the antiwar Left’s timetable, we would have had no bases from which to launch this operation.

Well done to one president for enacting all of these policy changes, and well done to his successor for keeping them in place.

Detroit - The Democrat's Ground Zero

It took liberal democrats fifty years to accomplish in Detroit what the US Army Air Corps did to Hiroshima in a millisecond. First they destroyed Detroit's educational system with a thirty year long illiteracy airburst delivered by the 509th Dumbass Wing of the Detroit Federation of Teachers.


From CBS Detroit:

According to a new report, 47 percent of Detroiters are ”functionally illiterate.” The alarming new statistics were released by the Detroit Regional Workforce Fund on Wednesday.

WWJ Newsradio 950 spoke with the Fund’s Director, Karen Tyler-Ruiz, who explained exactly what this means.

“Not able to fill out basic forms, for getting a job — those types of basic everyday (things). Reading a prescription; what’s on the bottle, how many you should take… just your basic everyday tasks,” she said.

Then the devastating follow-up economic ground assault. A Democrat controlled Congress deployed the Freddie and Fannie Toxic Mortgage Divisions and conquered vast expanses of sub prime loans. Armed with the Community Reinvestment Act, ACORN operatives and billions of TARP dollars, the Democrats and Republicans made short work of the US economy. From Detroit News.

The recession, high unemployment and the foreclosure crisis turned tens of thousands of Metro Detroit homeowners into renters, with far-reaching implications for schools, the economy and neighborhood stability.

New 2010 census data released today reveal a steep decline in home ownership, with 40,000 fewer owner-occupied homes in Wayne, Oakland, Macomb and Livingston counties than 10 years earlier.

Through long-range Alinsky strategic planning and faithful adherence to socialistic principles, these attacks have been carried throughout the US with the greatest success in democrat controlled cities.

Clue-Less

From the Bookworm Room:

1) There was a firefight.
2) There was no firefight.
3) Bin Laden was “resisting.”
4) Bin Laden wasn’t armed. (Makes the concept of “resisting” interesting.)
[4.a) And the newest one: the SEALS thought bin Laden was reaching for a weapon.]
5) He used his wife as a shield.
6) His wife was killed too.
7) He didn’t use his wife as a shield. She ran at a SEAL who shot her in the leg, but she’s fine.
8 ) Some other woman — the maid? — was used as a shield. By somebody. Downstairs.
9) That other woman — downstairs — was killed.
10) Maybe not. She was killed unless she wasn’t — and who was she, anyway?
11) Bin Laden’s son was killed.
12) Unless it was some other guy.
13) Bin Laden’s daughter saw him get killed. She’s undoubtedly traumatized, poor dear.
14) They were going to capture Bin Laden until the problem with the helicopter, which was:

A) It had mechanical trouble
B) It did a hard landing
C) It crashed
D) It clipped a wall with a tail rotor, effectively a crash

15.) They were never going to try to capture him; it was always a kill mission.
16.) No, it wasn’t.
17) The chopper blew up.
18) The SEALs blew it up.
19.) Panetta said yesterday the world needed proof and the photo would be released.
20.) Obama said today in an interview he taped with Steve Kroft for “60 Minutes” to be broadcast Sunday that it won’t be released. It’s too gruesome, would offend Muslim sensibilities (something he worries about a lot — I personally do not give a warm fart on a wet Wednesday about Muslim sensibilities), and how would Americans feel if Muslims released pictures of dead Americans?
21.) Kroft — who’s not a total idiot — pointed out that ever since “Black Hawk Down” days, Muslims have been doing precisely that, filming American bodies being dragged through the streets, filming Daniel Pearl’s head being cut off, filming any and everything.
22) Obama gets pissed at CBS, the tape gets cleaned up, that question disappears. (Inside info.)
23.) We got a “treasure trove” of stuff from hard drives, etc.
24.) There were no phone lines, and no internet access at the “mansion,” they didn’t even have TV — what “treasure trove?”
25.) There is obviously in the pictures of the place a large satellite dish. I guess they used it for making salads.
26.) And now, just today: apparently the idea was to capture him, but only if he was naked. There was a suspicion he might be wearing a suicide bomber type explosive vest, or belt. So if he’s not naked and you can’t see if he has a vest on or not – shoot him.

The idiot Carney — they actually managed to find someone who makes Gibbs look good — is currently twisting himself into knots trying to explain why the photograph that the whole world was expecting isn’t going to be released. (Obviously the thing to do is get Trump on the case, he’ll force Obama to release it.)

The military did great, the administration — or whatever that bunch is, kind of like “The Little Rascals” — have managed to turn it into spaghetti. The story has changed so many times in the course of a mere three days it’s a joke — the world would be better off if Panetta had left the little shitwit on the golf course.

Colonel Mustard.
In the Situation Room.
Full of clowns.

You Can Hide Some Of The Time Or Run Some Of The Time But You Can't Run And Hide All The Time

Yes, this picture is graphic. I make no excuses if it shocks you.
Allegedly this is the real deal.
While I can not certify that this photograph is of Osama Bin Laden, from my experience it indeed looks like a high velocity bullet wound to the head.

H/T Real Revo

Not to be a buzzkill, but...

Excuse me for asking:

Now that it's been revealed that no DNA test had been done before President Obama declared the death of Osama bin Laden, was the identity only verified by mobile facial recognition (supposed 99.9% accuracy)? We are now told the identification was made on facial recognition technology, using a photograph "wired back" to Washington from Abbottabad. Was that before or after his face was blown away with two head shots? Wikipedia says:

"Other conditions where face recognition does not work well include poor lighting, sunglasses, long hair, or other objects partially covering the subject's face, and low resolution images. Another serious disadvantage is that many systems are less effective if facial expressions vary. Even a big smile can render the system less effective."

I'm just asking.

The DNA test was done using a control sample from Bin Laden's sister. Would that be, as the Obama administration has claimed, 99.9% accurate? ? I'm just asking.

Well, at least if there are any doubts, the authorities still have custody of the body, so they can repeat the tests. Oh, crap! The Obama administration used the Chicago-style "cement shoes" technique of quickly getting rid of any evidence. Why? I'm just asking.

I want to celebrate the death of that tyrant as much as any other American citizen wants to do, but two plus years of this administration has taught me this:

DO NOT TRUST THE GOVERNMENT.

NEVER BELIEVE THESE LYING BASTARDS.

Remember this one? Obama's father was 10 years old when World War II ended.

Another Exclusive Pic Of That Burial at Sea

Well, it's about as much as the man deserved and it made me chuckle.

Lifted gleefully from, and with thanks to, Tundra Tabloids

Exclusive pictures of Bin Laden's burial at sea

Exclusive pictures of Bin Laden's burial at sea ... no wonder they did not want to publish them (sorry about the quality - same team that took the facial recognition pics). It is known as the Chappaquiddick technique, pioneered on the USS Kennedy, before its general adoption (below).

Hat Tip to Richard at EU Referendum

It's No Wonder Dogs Bite Their Owners

Dogs may be Man's BFF but Man has got to restrict his games to fetch and "Where's the ball?".

H/T to IOTW.

And So It Begins. Make way for the 'deathers'.

DNA cannot guarantee

US forces got the right man

99.9% Accuracy leaves room for doubt

The Australian

DESPITE statements by US officials they are "99 per cent confident" DNA evidence proves Osama bin Laden is dead, they have released no evidence to support the claim.

Nor have they provided so-called "photometric" evidence showing the body strongly resembles photographs of bin Laden; results of any post-mortem; or documentation of any body parts or blood samples collected from the corpse.

No solid evidence has been released corroborating claims the body was buried at sea.

Alan Cooper, director of Adelaide University's Australian Centre for Ancient DNA and expert in identifying bodies, said yesterday he would wish to see the state of the body for purposes of identification. He pointed out that the bin Laden family was large, which would make it possible for identification to be mistaken.

Despite media speculation, it is also unclear what, if any, DNA analysis has been conducted and, if so, on what.

(More...)

Sliced & Diced American Pie

Wikileaks has released documents showing that the planned integration of North America, Canada and Mexico is still under active consideration.

I find it worrying that issues I once raised with friends and family, and had me typecast as a 'conspiracy theory nutjob', are all coming to pass.

"Integration is a little-used term employed mainly by policy wonks. But while it may sound relatively harmless, it generally describes a very serious phenomenon when used in a geopolitical context — the gradual merging of separate countries under a regional authority.

"...Similar processes are already well underway in Europe, Africa, and South America. And according to critics, the results — essentially abolishing national sovereignty in favor of supranational, unaccountable governance — have been an unmitigated disaster...

"The scheme to merge North America into a political unit with its own legislature and currency is largely the brainchild of the world government-promoting Council on Foreign Relations. But though documents leaked earlier this year revealed that governments were trying to keep the process under wraps, integration is now proceeding out in the open for the most part.

"Where the campaign will eventually end remains to be seen. But if North American Union advocates get their way, the U.S. Constitution and its Mexican and Canadian counterparts could soon be rendered irrelevant. After that, plugging the regional units into a global system would be a relatively simple matter, critics and supporters both argue."

Slowly, slowly, step by step, they never sleep; we can see it happening right in front of our eyes and without the consent of the people.

The article has some excellent supporting links and I recommend you read it in full HERE.

We'll Meet Again

One of my favorite satirical movies is "Dr. Strangelove" starring Peter Sellers, George C. Scott and a host of other great actors. The movie ends with an all out nuclear war - fantastic atomic explosions, billowing mushroom clouds - and a haunting refrain.

"We'll Meet Again" played at the end of the movie was sung by Dame Vera Lynn who was accompanied by a few hundred men of the RAF. I ran across this video of the song. This lovely, sentimental tune is from a different age, almost a different world.

Sometimes I feel that I was born twenty years too late. I miss my father's generation, the innocence, the music, the trust...

Jerry Lee Lewis - Me and Bobby McGee

Jerry Lee Lewis. So good.

Osama Bin Laden Is Dead

Today the Taliban announced the beginning of their spring offensive.
Tonight the US announced that Osama Bin Hidin is dead.
Nice work Taliban, Osama is a first round draft choice in the US Armed Forces Worm Food League.

UPDATE: Worm food is no longer an operative expression. In order to adhere to journalistic standards embodying accuracy, dignity and fairness, please refrain from using "worm food" as a descriptive phrase illustrating the disposal of Mr. Bin Laden's mortal remains.

In lieu of this inaccurate and highly vituperative expression, please use the following:

Shark chum, lobster fart food, Allah's sushi, Moby Dick's chew toy, snail farm, barracuda butt wipe, Parrot fish poop, Mohammed's salt water taffy.

To Serve While Erect

Two Los Angeles Dept. of Transportation traffic enforcement officers have been accused of participating in pornographic films while on duty.

Allegations include: spanking, groping, fondling, wet willies, dry humphreys, moist molestation, slightly damp dandling and autoeroticism while reclining in the front seat of a parked traffic enforcement vehicle.

More charges may be filed when DNA tests are completed and the "Check Oil" light on the dash finally stops blinking excitedly.

City officials are looking into allegations that two traffic cops appeared in a porn video—while on the job and in uniform, reports KNBC-TV. Apparently, their boss found out about it and took no disciplinary action, and now the city transportation department has opened an investigation. "It's absolutely disgusting," says a department official. The officers are on administrative leave pending the investigation, reports the Los Angeles Times.

As for the video: It follows the adventures of a woman who approaches men at work. One of the LA officers allegedly fondles and spanks her. The other gets spanked by her and allows her into his city car, where she does unmentionable things (not involving the officer), explains KNBC. “If there is any criminal aspect to this, there will be action,” says an "appalled and outraged" city councilman.

Apparently both officers have been temporarily transferred to the Adventures in Vehicular Foreplay Division.

What's Happening??

Today, on Drudge Report, I saw this photo of Barack Obama the Elder with the caption "Obama's father forced out at Harvard". I thought nothing of it.

Then, this afternoon, I was looking through my April issue of Nickelodeon Magazine and came across the following publicity shot. Can somebody please explain what's happening? What am I missing?