December 4, 2011

How Barney Frank Got Rear Ended

It just happens. You're sitting at a red light  minding your own business when all of a sudden out of a clear blue sky - BAM! - somebody ass-ends you, and not in a manner that you're accustomed to. Only too late do you realize that you were stting there day dreaming while the light changed.

It couldn't happen to a more deserving guy...

From the Boston Herald:
Barney Frank has always been the smartest guy in the room — just ask him.

As for Eddie Markey, well, let’s just say that he isn’t — even if the room is a broom closet and the only other thing in it is a mop.

So here’s the irony: Barney Frank, so arrogant, so full of himself, so intoxicated by decades of fawning media coverage, just assumed that he would be taken care of in redistricting by the peons in the Legislature.

Meanwhile, Fast Eddie was sucking up to these same below-average solons. Markey may not be the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree, but he was smart enough to remember Tip O’Neill’s old adage about how you have to ask for every vote.

[...]Barney got caught flat-flooted. He didn’t wake up until the sky was dark with chickens coming to roost. To quote Oscar Wilde: It would take a heart of stone not to laugh.

“They didn’t do me any favors,” Barney said. But why would they?

He hadn’t cultivated any of the newer reps; he probably still only knew a handful. The other congressman who got his way at Barney’s expense was Steve Lynch of South Boston and there’s another ironic twist for you.

For years Southie’s Senate President Billy Bulger unsuccessfully tried to wreck Barney’s career, in both legislative and congressional redistricting. But now, all these years later, Steve Lynch, the guy who ended the Bulger dynasty in Southie, now takes care of his old foe’s final unfinished piece of business.

Apparently when the state reps sliced up the electoral pie, poor Barney didn't get a big enough piece. He finally woke up at the wheel but by then it was too late.

At the end, Barney realized he was in a jam and begged for all of Fall River. But that would have required some shifts on the Irish Riviera. Lynch, backed by his own surrogate, Rep. Mike Moran of Brighton, refused to give up any of the South Shore. He had fashioned the perfect district for himself, shorn of minorities and heretics (Needham) and what did he owe Barney?
Nobody owes Frank anything. Quite the opposite; Frank should be investigated and imprisoned for poisoning the financial industry and leaving the retirement plans of millions of people in ruins.

But Barney will retire in style. Here is his luxury yacht tied up in Boston Harbor.


el chupacabra said...

I lulzed. Bahney Fwank cringed.

IanH said...

As a Northern Boy, who is Barney in real life?

Quite Rightly said...

So that's what happened.

And very convenient for Maxine Waters, his replacement on the House Financial Services Committee.

Proving, once again, that no good deed goes unpunished.

Libertarian Advocate said...

Gotta love that yacht's name....

No doubt Barney will land a comfortable gig. Maybe he can return to New Jersey from whence he originally slithered.

sig94 said...

el chu - I think I grok what you said. I think.

sig94 said...

IanH - In real life he is a fraud and a liar. Same as his professional life.

sig94 said...

QR - Max Waters needs to be heavily sedated and put away for the rest of her natural life. Once she is certifiably dead, she will still need to be cremated prior to being released from protective custody.

sig94 said...

Lib Ad - they always do. Perhap he will be the new spokesman for Preparation H.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Good thing I put the coffee down before I read that title.

sig94 said...

Odie - I hope it's decaf. It doesn't damage the keyboard as much.