June 2, 2013

In The News

Anything Bigger Than A Mouthful

Are double Ds about to go the way of the dodo? That's what Jockey International is hoping, now that the company has introduced JOCKEY Bra, based on a brand new sizing system focused on breast volume rather than the rigid cup and band measurement system currently used in the industry.

Instead of the typical A, B, C, D, etc, cup, Jockey's Volumetric Fit System measures the volume and shape of a woman's breast plus an under-bust measurement, with the volumetric sizes running from 1 through to 10. The new system has 55 size combinations, and promises to address the long-bemoaned problem of ill-fitting bras.
I can see it now; brawny construction workers yelling down from the high iron, "Hey you, ya you! The 3.6 liter babe! Hubba hubba!"

Nothing Is Safe Anymore
Hollywood actor Michael Douglas has claimed that his throat cancer was caused by performing oral sex on women.

The star, who fought a six month battle with the disease from August 2010 until January 2011, had initially believed that it was his years of smoking and drinking that had lead to the illness.

However, in a new interview the 68-year-old said that the particular strain he had suffered with was caused by human papilloma virus (HPV), a sexually transmitted disease.
Caffeine, nicotine, benzene, aspartaine and now...

She Was Arraigned in Maine for Pulling the Train
A 29-year-old Zumba instructor was sentenced to 10 months in jail Friday for engaging in prostitution out of her fitness studio in the picturesque town of Kennebunk, Maine.

In addition to the time in jail, Alexis Wright must pay more than $57,000 in restitution and $1,000 in fines, according to a sentencing memorandum.

Prosecutors dropped more than 80 other counts and downplayed the more serious tax related charges from felonies to misdemeanors, according to the sentencing documents.
Bill Clinton just hired her as his physical fitness instructor.


Ian H said...


Gorges Smythe said...

That's news alright! lol

TSWS said...

She and her Whores are probably Bundlers of Campaign Dollars for the DemocRats.
Like what started Watergate Break IN, and Nixon's Fall.

Doom said...

1.) What I have found in knowing a few women *cough* is that the reasons bras fit poorly is because women don't like the honest truth. Whether bigger or smaller, they want what they don't have. It has been, and will always be, a pleasure to see most women juggle into those things. Coulda and shoulda doesn't equal "is". A joy to behold though.

2.) *cough*

3.) Immoral, yes. No one said anything about stupid. Just a note.

Subvet said...

I'm sure Catherine Zeta Jones appreciates the honesty of her husband. Wonder if he's done sleeping on the couch yet?