September 24, 2014

In The News

Michele Obama Hacks Up Another Loogie
Wednesday, First Lady Michelle Obama said that American women are suffering under "harmful cultural norms" at a U.N. education event.

Mrs. Obama said, "Women here are still woefully underrepresented in our government and the senior ranks of corporations. We still struggle with violence against woman and harmful cultural norms that tell woman how they are expected to look and act."
Cooking hearty nutritious meals for your family, bathing, looking nice for your husband, yup, racist.

The Curry Planet
India's Mars Orbiter Mission successfully entered Mars' orbit Wednesday morning, becoming the first nation to arrive on its first attempt and the first Asian country to reach the Red Planet.

"We have gone beyond the boundaries of human enterprise and human imagination," declared India's Prime Minister Narendra Modi, who watched from the space agency's nerve center in Bangalore. "We have accurately navigated our spacecraft through a route known to a very few."
That mysterious red dot on Indian women's foreheads suddenly takes on a new meaning.

Yeah, That'll Take Care Of The Problem
CLEMSON, S.C. — Clemson University has suspended all fraternity activities after reports of alcohol abuse and sexual misconduct.

Vice president for student affairs Gail DiSabatino says all 24 campus fraternities are affected.
Why else would you join a fraternity?


LL said...

1. The first thing that I want to know is whether or not Michelle Obama was born a woman or a man. Then we can move onto the issue of her standing to address women's issues...and hygiene.

2. Do you mean to say that the red dot is NOT a pimento?

3. Alcohol and sex -- at a fraternity? What will they think of banning next? I mean, it's what attracts late teen and early twenty-something men to college campuses in the first place.

Fredd said...

I am fairly certain that it would be among those harmful cultural norms if I suggested that just one of Michelle's meaty haunches could feed a battalion of cannibals for a week or more.

Drinking. And (gasp) sex! At a fraternity??!! I'm shocked, SHOCKED.