The Ballard of Barak And Reggie

The Kingston Trio recorded a great song in 1959 called "The M.T.A." I loved hearing this song on the AM radio when I was a kid.

So, with my sincere apologies to the Kingston Trio, I present the following.

THE BALLARD OF BARAK AND REGGIE

Well, let me tell you of the story of a man named Reggie on a tragic and fateful day.

He got called to the White House by his best friend Barak and there he went without delay.

Chorus

Well, did he ever return? No, Reggie never returned and his fate is still unlearned.

Poor ole Reggie! They were strolling together towards a White House bathroom.

He's the man who never returned.

Reggie ran past the Agent at the Secret Service station, because Barak had made it plain

There would be no checking of his ID or his mission; he wanted Reggie to pull his train.

Chorus

Now, all day long Barak was riding Reggie, yelling, "Michelle, what's she to me?!!"

"I need a nag like Michelle to give me more problems like my dog Bo needs more fleas!"

Chorus

Obama sends an intern to the nearby K-Mart every day at half past two.

She buys a tube of ointment and yells, "Reggie, your KY!" as the pair comes rambling through.

Chorus

Now, all you people, don't you think it's a scandal, Obama's vacations for which you pay?

Ole Reggie's still missing! He's not at Martha's Vineyard! Get ole Reggie out of the bathroom today!

Well, did he ever return? No, Reggie never returned and his fate is still unlearned.

Poor ole Reggie! They were strolling together towards a White House bathroom.

He's the man who never returned.

H/T to FOTM for the inspiration.