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April 19, 2015

Love And Marriage

Remember the 1955 song "Love and Marriage?" It was written by Sammy Cahn and sung by Frank Sinatra. I remember this ditty from radio and television, it was very popular.

Love and marriage, love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage
This I tell you brother
You can't have one without the other

Love and marriage, love and marriage
It's an institute you can't disparage
Ask the local gentry
And they will say it's elementary

No more.

Men have fled the institution of marriage and now a work by a US researcher, Dr Helen Smith, a forensic psychologist at the University of Tennessee and author of "Why Men Are Boycotting Marriage, Fatherhood And The American Dream" sheds some welcome light on this trend.
‘Ultimately, men know there’s a good chance they’ll lose their friends, their respect, their space, their sex life, their money and — if it all goes wrong — their family...'

‘They don’t want to enter into a legal contract with someone who could effectively take half their savings, pension and property when the honeymoon period is over.

‘Men aren’t wimping out by staying unmarried or being commitment phobes. They’re being smart.’
Story here.

The following is from her book blurb on Amazon:
... men aren’t dropping out because they are stuck in arrested development. They are instead acting rationally in response to the lack of incentives society offers them to be responsible fathers, husbands and providers. In addition, men are going on strike, either consciously or unconsciously, because they do not want to be injured by the myriad of laws, attitudes and hostility against them for the crime of happening to be male in the twenty-first century. Men are starting to fight back against the backlash.

Dr. Smith also has a blog.

2 comments:

Fredd said...

Over my lifetime (I just turned 60), I have watched American culture depict the father in the family as a pipe smoking, newspaper reading pillar of the community to a bungling, bumbling idiot.

You can't turn on the TV without seeing men seen as either an outright criminal menace to society, or as stupid dolts who can't seem to correctly pour milk on their cereal without trashing the kitchen.

Of course we're fighting back. Most men are still competitive, despite the best efforts of the bull dykes heading up N.O.W. and Planned Parenthood to minimize men's roles in society.

sig94 said...

Fredd - same thing here. From commercials to comedies men, particularly white males, are objects of scorn and ridicule.

I hope you enjoyed the laughs ladies.