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September 22, 2015

I Guess It Means ... You Stink

Scientists with waay too much time on their hands and waay too little grant money have allegedly discovered a new forensic technique to identify people. And of course submit new grant research applications.
Every human on earth has a cloud of germs surrounding them at all times - and it is almost as distinct to that person as a fingerprint.

The "microbial cloud" contains millions of bugs that are put out from various pores and points in our bodies.

According to experts, the cloud hangs around a person's body at all times and each individual cloud has a signature that could be read by carrying out genetic analysis of the bacteria.

Scientists were able to identify individuals from a group of volunteers just by sampling germs from the air around them.

The noxious nimbus consists of combinations of microbes emitted from our bodies that vary from person to person.

More here.

5 comments:

Doom said...

Stink? Well... yeah. Though God bless us stinky mortal bits, and friends. Humility has it's place. And, how knows... I know a number of women who really did like my "stink". They missed it when I was gone, if at times they said it could be a bit much. Make of all that what you will. I fail to truly understand.

But there is an advantage many don't consider. Yes, I have realized it, and use it to my benefit. No matter who else is around? You are never alone. :) So, when I say "we will see", I may not be even including you. Oh, and you never have to bug out, you could always just bug in, or in place, or such? :p

Fredd said...

Two characters come to mind that have clouds of 'stuff' that envelop them:

1. Al Capp of Lil' Abner fame created a character called 'Joe Btfsplk.' Yes, Joe Btfsplk, with no vowels in his last name. This guy was followed by bad luck everywhere he went, and had a rain cloud right over his head in every frame. It's true.

2. Peanut's character 'Pig Pen' created by Charles Schultz also has a visible aura of filth, much like you describe, wafting from his person every time he moves. It's true.

Undergroundpewster said...

The bacteria are running the show. We exist only as incubators and transportation vessels for their offspring.

Doom said...

u.p.,

I like to think, if one is rebel enough? Yeah, the minority runs the show... just not the typical minority. *grins* Although, even I admit, after much more life than is possible if you abide manmade science... a true rebel isn't a rebel to God, merely to flesh. In the circles I come from, such is blasphemy. If I think that makes me just the right kind of rebel.

Undergroundpewster said...

You stinker, Doom.