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February 23, 2011

Looking For Mr. Goodfelafel

Waiting for the 13th Imam to climb out of his well can be a lonely business when you're the leader of Iran.


Even a half inch thick prayer bump ("zebibah" meaning "raisin") caused by slamming your head on the pavement five times a day is not enough to get you through the hard times.

When executing homosexuals and torturing student protesters no longer excites you, you need a new outlook on life. Perhaps companionship; an understanding shoulder or warm, gentle eyes to gaze into and lose yourself. Preferably someone just as batshit crazy as you.



A quick, passionate embrace and it seems like your very soul is on fire. Those moments are precious. Nothing says "I Love You" like a big, wet muh-ah from a mullah.

But then there are times when you know that the magic is gone and you despair that you'll ever find it again. A quickie on the cheekie and we're done.


Just when it seems like all hope is gone, suddenly, someone walks into your life and the vale of tears disappears.

The Sun always seems to shine just a little bit brighter when a new nutjob walks into your life.

19 comments:

commoncents said...

THANK YOU for posting this! I love
going to your blog!!

Steve
Common Cents
http://www.commoncts.blogspot.com

WomanHonorThyself said...

good one...shmucks all of them..and the tyrant in the WH loves them all.

tha malcontent said...

A-holes of a feather stick together.

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

Damn, it looks like another shortage of goats.

LL said...

Just when you thought that you could choke down breakfast...without it coming right back up.

Nickie Goomba said...

Woody... I'm sure Obama would step into action if goats were in short supply... but ABSOLUTELY NO offshore goat farms.

Zio Rico said...

As long as they are kissing each other they are leaving the little boys alone.

Rhod said...

Touching moments, in a David Lynch kind of way.

sig94 said...

WHT - if smuck means a dangerous psychopath, then I'm with you. I think these apes are beyond mere smuckery.

sig94 said...

Mal - I wonder what substance is making them stick together? On second thought, I really don't want to know.

sig94 said...

Odie - If you remember, in the Kirk Douglas movie "Spartacus," Laurence Olivier asked his servant (Tony Curtis) whether he favored oysters or mussles in a vailed reference to sexual preferences. With the clowns shown in this post, it is oysters, mussles, octopi, whales, rocks, shrubs and Buicks.

sig94 said...

LL - I knew you were having tongue for breakfast.

sig94 said...

Zio - they already went through the boys, they were just the appetizers. Amindinnerjacket likes something a little more robust for the main course.

sig94 said...

Rhod - or in a Barney Frank kind of way.

sig94 said...

Nickie - Perhaps the Iranian Caliph of Man-Tonsil Hockey has grown weary of the domestic herd. His enervated palate requires a change; something imported that is brash and raw, maybe a chubby Venezuelan spice boi?

The_Kid said...

Funny :)

Goodnight Vienna said...

Where does Tony Blair, our Middle East Peace Envoy, slot in to all of this?

sig94 said...

GV - If Tony was in any way involved in the release of the Lockerbie bomber, his slot is in Hell.

Goodnight Vienna said...

You know he was. I think he'll be somewhere close to Gadaffi's b/side.