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November 18, 2009

These days the news ain't on "the news" and you can't tell whether it's "news", "comedy", or a "tragedy", but ...

The following actually appeared on www.recovery.gov. His Competency, Pres. Obama, apparently has not yet figured out how to operate them internets.

Here's an actual post on the website, from some one down in Texas not fond of the "Stimulus Package" and also with a sense of humor (no, not me or my kinfolk ... there are millions of such folks here):

SEN. FOGHORN LEGHORN ANNOUNCES $14.7 MILLION FOR TEXAS; ‘YEE, HAW!’ HE ADDS

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE*

WASHINGTON – U.S. Sen. Foghorn J. Leghorn, D-State, announced Tuesday that he had won an extra $14.7 million in stimulating funds from the solicitous Obama Administration for the people of seven congressional districts in Texas.

“This funding will go for good,” the Senator said. “Why, son, 98 hardworking, taxpaying, aging, poor, honest, hungry, working-class, middle-class, undereducated, disadvantaged, undercounted, overlooked, underprivileged, overtaxed and uninsured constituents of my good friends and esteemed colleagues in the 52nd, 58th, 86th, 00th, 68th, 91st, and 85th Congressional Districts of Texas deserve every penny,” he added. “Yep, they can shore count on me. Vote Leghorn! Yee, haw!”

Following is an official, premeditated account* of the stimulating funds provided by the Obama Administration through Sen. Leghorn’s good offices:

Texas Congressional District Jobs Amount

52nd congressional district 0 $8,937,289
58th congressional district 45 $3,659,694
86th congressional district 6 $943,326
00 congressional district 11 $752,292
68th congressional district 1 $310,963
91st congressional district 30 $57,367
85th congressional district 5 $56,661

Stimulus Total: $14,717,592

Jobs Total: 98

*Please don’t call Sen. Leghorn’s office about this. He’s busy working on health care today. For further information on this gracious investment of job-creating government money, please “track the money” through the President’s Recovery website, http://www.recovery.gov/Pages/TextView.aspx?data=stateSummaryAllCD&statecode=TX

Thanks to Redstate for this jewel.

God bless Texas and Long Live Foghorn Leghorn ... "I say, I say, boy ..."

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

Perhaps some entity like the MSM could focus on this fraud and failure. 60 Minutes could do a segment and stir the passions of a nation. The New York Times could do a 10-part series on how the administration has mishandled funds. Hollywood celebrities could begin turning their wit and sarcasm onto the man who has ignored the American worker.

It could happen, couldn't it DC? Couldn't it?

Anonymous said...

No.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I want to know how to get one of those jobs. Do I have to join a union?

Anonymous said...

Anon, I'm not sure about Texas but in Chicago you have to be dead.

Anonymous said...

Nick, some one is zapping comments.

Anon, yes, the only scab on Sen. Leghorn's staff is that little chick that used to give him so much grief.

Opus #6 said...

What on Earth did Secretia say. I see her there with a close-up of her chest. My imagination is running wild.

Anonymous said...

I think she made a pass at Nick ... we are searching the IP.

But in all seriousness, she runs a blog where people tell secrets. Some rumor has it that a guy from CA posing at Rhod is baring his soul and pretty much everything else over there. Oh, my ... it could get nasty.

Anonymous said...

That's a lie, DC. A dirty stinkin' lie. I'm using the name "Rhad".

Anonymous said...

"Rhadhorn Leghorn from CT", to be exact. Oh geez ... I think she's a spy. Get of that site, man!!!

Anonymous said...

Ope, Secretia said nothing wrong, but committed one of the most unfortunate typos ever. She is welcome here any time. In fact, she commented on an earlier post.

I will welcome her bosoms to my bosom.

Anonymous said...

Nick, my Bosom Buddy ...

Man, I can't believe I missed it. Can you give us a hint? Did she call Rhod "RHot"? Oh, man ...

Rhod said...

These comments are the literary equivalent of a rolled-up, wet towel.

Rhod said...

I just noticed that Secretia has had 4900 profile views. 4899 are from a lawyer in Texas.

Becky said...

The news is pretty tragic... Depressing yet I can't stop watching. I can't make myself go back into the dark on the issues again.

Anonymous said...

Secretia,

My great work in life is to complete work on Magnum Opus -- rHod's tHesaurus.

Ar-Hod in CT

Rhod ... nice whack about the worms. Tip o' the cover.

Opus #6 said...

Did somebody say Opus?

Anonymous said...

Different Opus, Ope. That one has a dark mustache.

Velcro said...

I always wondered what happened to old Foghorn. Sounds like he got himself a good, stable job.

Anonymous said...

Relax, Opie ... I didn't say that Ar-Hod was working on a Magnum Opie ...

Vel, Foghorn is a legend here in Texas. Never forget it.

Velcro said...

Yes s-ah say Yes suh!

Unknown said...

Now I do not feel so bad about all the fake people ACORN registered. Now that we have fake districts for them to vote in, I think it will all even out.

conquer The Monkey said...

wow, this is a funny exchange! Thanks to Nickie Goomba for coming by my blog yesterday, will be reading you stuff here!

Rhod said...

Conquer The Monkey? DC appeared in an independent film by that name under the credit Oliver Klozoff.

Anonymous said...

I like Trestin's thinking.

Wait ... this just in.

Secretia,

I saw "Conquer the Monkey" 4 times in one day.

-- Rhod from CT

Anonymous said...

My friend, you have truly conquered the monkey!