GNN EXCLUSIVE - From the GNN Tel Aviv Bureau, a report that several hours ago Israeli Defense Force checkpoint personnel were approached by a Palestinian insurgent, later identified as Ey bin Phartine, who tearfully asked for assistance in removing a new form of terrorist artillery from his body - developed in Gaza as the Arafat Butt Gat. Israel authorities have labeled this device the AssCan.
IDF explosive ordinance specialists were summoned to the checkpoint and the would-be terrorist was transported to a heavily fortified location where the above x-ray was taken of the projectile. Subsequent debriefings revealed that the ignition system is gas operated and was designed to launch the missile from a praying position - toes, knees, hands and forehead touching the launch or prayer pad.
Further examination showed tattooed windage markings on the suspect's heels and a peep sight attached to his scrotum.
UPDATE: Tragedy struck only moments ago when the terrorist complained of sharp stomach pains after eating lunch. He was lead to a concrete evacuation chamber where sounds of flatulence preceded a powerful explosion. IDF officials suspect that felafels were involved in this premature detonation.
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