Fiddy Cal Fairie

"Zero point four five mils high. Angle zero.Range sixteen hundred and ninety three meters. Dial twenty two mils plus one click. Yeah that's him. he gave me cooties"

LOL! Found this at US Army WTF! Moments

Tie The Media Down, Sport

Tan me hide when I'm dead, Fred,

Tan me hide when I'm dead.

So we tanned his hide

When he died, Clyde,

And that's it

Hanging on the shed.

All together now!

Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport

Tie Me Kangaroo Down

Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport

Tie Me Kangaroo Down

Apparently there are powerful influences, people in the know, who are trying to hang Obugger's hide on the shed for that messed up operation in Benghazi. It turns out that everyone was in Benghazi for some reason (illegal arms deals with Islamic terrorists for $1000, Alex)  and that the CIA is squirreling their people away like nuts before winter.

For his part, Obugger and his crew are dancing around this turd ala Fred Astaire and Ginger Rodgers after a bath salts binge. I wonder just how long the media can sit on this before it blows up in their faces.

From Gateway Pundit:

Rep. Trey Gowdy (R-SC) was on with Greta Van Susteren Thursday to discuss the Obama scandals.

This came after Jake Tapper at CNN broke the news that there were “dozens” of CIA operatives on the ground in Benghazi on 9-11 when the consulate came under attack and the agency is going to great lengths to make sure whatever it was doing, remains a secret.

Gowdy told Greta the Obama Administration is hiding the survivors, dispersing them around the country, AND changing their names.

“Including changing names, creating aliases. Stop and think what things are most calculated to get at the truth? Talk to people with first-hand knowledge. What creates the appearance and perhaps the reality of a cover-up? Not letting us talk with people who have the most amount of information, dispersing them around the country and changing their names.”

And, at the same time Obama is hiding the survivors around the country he’s calling Benghazi a ‘phony’ scandal.

More here.
I believe Obugger is self medicating right now, so let's sing him a new verse:

Keep Benghazi under wraps, Piaps,

Keep Benghazi under wraps.

So we blew the cover off the deal, Neal,

And now it's landed in his lap.

All together now!

Tie the media down Sport,

Tie the media down.

Tie the media down Sport,

Tie the media down.

Moonlighting In Mexico

The old "Have Gun, Will Travel" television series starring Richard Boone was a favorite of mine.  The series had a character named Paladin who traveled throughout the Olde West bringing respite and justice to the weary by ....  mostly killing people or threatening to do so. Or just by showing up with his bad acne-scarred self and giving his quintessential "I am bored, I want to kill someone" stare. He never ate, he never slept, he eschewed the company of women. I don't think he ever had a bowel movement either.

But Paladin reflected a need. In some areas of the world there always seems to be a need for a person who is well-versed in the use of a six gun, or a M16. As in the days of Paladin, these places are teeming with individuals seeking respite and justice; they will pay any price to obtain the services of someone who can provide the desired respite and justice.
Mexico is one of the those (these?) places.
This is my story.

Actually it's the story of active and former GI's who have presented their skills to the marketplace and found a profitable niche.

From Fox News:

Mexican cartels are recruiting hit men from the U.S. military, offering big money to highly-trained soldiers to carry out contract killings and potentially share their skills with gangsters south of the border, according to law enforcement experts.

The involvement of three American soldiers in separate incidents, including a 2009 murder that led to last week’s life sentence for a former Army private, underscore a problem the U.S. military has fought hard to address.

Actually there isn't much that is new here. It has been known for some time that gang members have been enlisting in the Army in order to gain military training in weapons use and small unit tactics.

"We have seen examples over the past few years where American servicemen are becoming involved in this type of activity," said Fred Burton, vice president for STRATFOR Global Intelligence. "It is quite worrisome to have individuals with specialized military training and combat experience being associated with the cartels."

Perhaps Obama and Holder are looking at this as a new resume building program that dovetails with their "Fast and Furious" gun trafficking. Let's face it, it made no sense to give the cartels all those thousands of guns unless they had some kind of instructor program.

Don't Give Up On Us

We're cousins, born of the same gene that won't give up and refuses to lie down to unelected authority.

It's tough here in England; the country is being broken up into Regions of the European Union. England has no government, no Parliament and Great Britain itself is struggling with overwhelmed taxpayer-funded resources (eg the NHS,  the Police Force/Service).  In short, this country is about to discover that we've been fucked, royally, many times over.

The European Union and successive governments (Labour/Conservative) have done this, stealthily (aka lied in their manifestos), over many years.  When people actually realise what's happened it won't be pretty.

Our children's education has been shot to pieces because it's been infiltrated by people who think equality is the be all and end all and our country's history has been re-written.

In your own fight for freedom of expression and freedom of association, don't forget us and don't believe what you read in the msm.  We haven't forgotten you - we really are stronger together. The expression 'Divided we fall' was never more true.

God bless America and good luck with Obama - same stable, same donkey - because you need it too.

Junior Officer Exodus

In 2005, more than a third of the West Point Class of 2000 left active duty after completing their mandatory five-year tour of duty. Why?

Here's a recent disturbing article written by a Marine Lt. who also has had enough with the modern warrior culture.

Why are we getting out? It's about the low standards.

We joined because we wanted to be part of an elite organization dedicated to doing amazing things in defense of our nation. We wanted to make a contribution to something great, to be able to look back at a decisive chapter in American history and say "yeah, I was part of that." We joined the Corps because if we were going in to the fight, we wanted to serve with the best. We wanted the kind of job that would make our friends who took soulless, high-paying corporate jobs feel pangs of jealousy because we went to work every day with a purpose.

It causes a deep, bitter pain to acknowledge that I don't think this is the organization in which I currently serve. The reason we're getting out is because the Marine Corps imposes a high degree of stress, yet accepts Mission Failure so long as all the boxes on the list are checked.

I'm talking about the Field Grade Intelligence Officer in Afghanistan who didn't know who Mullah Omar was. I'm talking about a senior Staff NCO in the intelligence community who could not produce a legible paragraph. I'm talking about a Battalion Commander who took pride in the fact that he had done zero research on Afghanistan, because it allowed him to approach his deployment with "an open mind." I'm talking about contractors, some of whom were literally paid ten-fold the salary of my junior Marines, who were incapable of performing basic tasks and functionally illiterate.

The problem is not so much that these individuals pop up every now and then, as every organization has its bad eggs, but rather that we see them passed on through the system, promoted and rewarded. If we are truly the elite organization we claim to be, how do we justify the fact that we allow these individuals to retain positions of immense influence, much less promote through the ranks? How do we justify this endemic tolerance for mediocrity or outright incompetence?

Here's the money quote.

If you really want to know what an institution values, don't look at its mottos or mission statements. Look at how it spends its resources, especially its human capital. Economists call this "Revealed Preference." When I was in the midst of a time-critical project aimed at mapping insurgent networks in Helmand, I was told to put the project on hiatus so I could organize a visit from General Allen. The implicit message was that a smooth itinerary and content General were more important than catching an insurgent cell before they left for Pakistan. How else was I supposed to interpret this? In my opinion, it's not so much that the Marine Corps doesn't value ideas, but that -- when the chips are down and careers are at stake -- it values appearance and conformity more than winning. The implicit message -- what the Marine Corps reveals by its actions -- is that it's okay to fail to provide any added value, so long as the PowerPoint slides are free of typos, no serialized gear is lost, and everyone attends the Sexual Harassment Prevention training

Read the rest of the article here. This not only affects the military. Many large police departments are run the same way.

Sorry, I Relapsed

It's like someone grabbed a half dozen squirrels, shoved a bunch of lit 4th of July sparklers up their asses and set them loose inside his head.

A scene from Inspector Weiner and the Case of the
Missing Dickie Tweets: "Round up the usual suspects!"

Headline from the Daily News:

Weiner campaign paid private eye $45,000 to investigate own 2011 Twitter ‘hacking’ lie, reports show

The ‘hacking’ never happened — Weiner later admitted to sending the racy pics himself — but his furious attempt at damage control included an expensive investigation by T&M Protection services.

Story here.

Brand New E6

Taken at BAF, Afghanistan.

I'm one proud Dad. And she re-upped for three more.

Goober Peas

I learned this song in grade school.
For some reason I just thought of it today.
I don't know why.
It was sung by Confederate soldiers during the Civil War.
Life was tough enough for the Johnnies and then all you had to eat were peanuts.

Sitting by the roadside on a summer's day
Chatting with my mess-mates passing time away
Lying in the shadows underneath the trees
Goodness how delicious eating goober peas.

Chorus:
Peas, peas, peas, peas
Eating goober peas
Goodness how delicious
Eating goober peas.

These are the rest of the stanzas.

When a horse-man passes, the soldiers have a rule
To cry out their loudest, 'Mister, where's your mule?'
But another custom, enchanting-er than these
Is wearing out your grinders, eating goober peas.

Chorus

Just before the battle, the General hears a row
He says 'The Yanks are coming, I hear their rifles now.'
He looks down the roadway and what d'you think he sees?
The Georgia Militia cracking goober peas.

Chorus

I think my song has lasted just about enough.
The subject's interesting but the rhymes are mighty rough.
I wish the war was over so free from rags and fleas
We'd kiss our wives and sweethearts, say good-bye to goober peas.

Chorus

Archbishop Tutu: Too Too Far Off The Reservation

Archbishop Desmond Tutu has a preference.

The South African Nobel peace laureate Archbishop Desmond Tutu says he will never worship a 'homophobic God' and would rather go to hell than find himself in a 'homophobic heaven'.

No problem, we can work with that. Just don't ask for sympathy when you ultimately receive what you asked for. Make sure you bring a sun blocker of SPF 6,000,000,000 with you. It won't help but perhaps you won't be as crispy.

The retired archbishop said the fight against homophobia in South Africa was similar to the campaign waged against racial apartheid in South Africa.

Scripture is absolutely clear on this, those who use men as they would use a woman are specifically condemned by the Creator. There is no ambiguity possible. There is no similarity: race is not a choice, consensual sodomy is.

Archbishop Tutu, 81, was speaking at the launch of the UN's first global campaign to promote gay rights.

That's not the only travesty the UN is promoting. The UN wants a global carbon policy (all the better to steal from wealthy nations), invites the world's most vicious regimes to sit on UN human rights commissions and stood idly by while 800,000 people were slaughtered in Rwanda.  The promotion of murder and mayhem has been part of the UN agenda for decades.

Archbishop Tutu has wandered too too far off the reservation. He has chosen to please Man rather than his Savior. He needs to reconsider his position and ignore the liberal crap that permeates his church. So here you go, biblical references to consider:

Leviticus 18:22 - You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination.

Abomination. That's sorta like Obamacare only the IRS does the heavy fudge packing.

Leviticus 20:13 - If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of them have committed a detestable act; they shall surely be put to death. Their bloodguiltiness is upon them.

This is a twofer Tutu.
It is not better to give rather than receive.

Romans 1:26-27 - For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error.

The rapid spread of AIDS was exacerbated by the preternatural sexual urges of homosexuals. It was not uncommon for them to have 1,000 trysts a year, all with different men. If a straight male needed to have sex with two or three different woman every night we'd say there was something wrong with him. Not so gays.

I Corinthians 6:9(NIV) - Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

God's seating chart trumps yours Tutu.

I Timothy 1:8-11 (NASB) - "But we know that the Law is good, if one uses it lawfully, realizing the fact that law is not made for a righteous person, but for those who are lawless and rebellious, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers and immoral men and homosexuals and kidnappers and liars and perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to sound teaching, according to the glorious gospel of the blessed God, with which I have been entrusted."

That's some pretty rude company you're keeping Archbishop. Indeed, Jesus sat and ate with sinners - He loved them and did not wish to see them suffer the consequences, but He did not defend their actions. His words to them were: "Go and sin no more." Your words seem to be, "Bruce, make sure you bring the KY and the KFC to the picnic."

Jude 1:6-7 (NASB) - And angels who did not keep their own domain, but abandoned their proper abode, He has kept in eternal bonds under darkness for the judgment of the great day, just as Sodom and Gomorrah and the cities around them, since they in the same way as these indulged in gross immorality and went after strange flesh, are exhibited as an example in undergoing the punishment of eternal fire.

There ya go Desmond, fixed it for ya. No matter how you prepare it or what sauces you use, "Strange Flesh" is not part of the Christian menu.

Truth

H/T Weasel Zippers

This Is Wild!

Looks like a blast, but I can almost hear the sound of lawsuits hitting the courts for injuries and dementia from traumatic brain damage. We are humans, not porpoises.

I... Can't... Help... It

Wow. The last three posts have all been "Weiner-oriented" or have mentioned him.
And I have just about worn out the " key.

I have obviously been suffering from some form of "Weiner fixation.
Oops. There goes the    key.

Weiner this. Weiner that.
Weiner here. Weiner there.
Weiner how. Weiner why. Weiner when.
Huma mad. Huma forgives. Huma loves.
Huma overdoses on eyeliner.

I simply must refocus to preserve my artistic, editorial and journalistic integrity.

Please wish me luck.
Here goes.

 

FRANCE BOMBS NIGER!!!

Niger's interior minister says a body fell from an Air France plane as it approached the West African country's capital, Niamey, and was discovered lifeless in western suburb.

Niamey and its suburbs have an international reputation for lousy cuisine. But on the plus side, their service is also horrendous which does please the French.

Abdou Labo said a resident was standing just a few meters from where the body landed at around 5 a.m. Thursday. He said police arrived and found "the lifeless body of a black person, lying in blood."

French authorities refuse to comment on why this mysterious, unidentified resident was targeted. It was also reported that the body landed late, several hours behind its scheduled landing. Its luggage is also missing.

He also said blood had been spotted on the left wing of the plane.

Since the incident occurred on a Wednesday, French flight union regulations state that the right wing cannot be inspected until the following Monday, or maybe Tuesday... after lunch.

Labo said the plane was coming from Burkina Faso's capital, Ouagadougou, and was scheduled to continue to Paris.

To reload.

Officials were holding the plane in Niamey so crew members and passengers could be interviewed. Investigators in Ouagadougou are also looking into "the conditions in which the passengers boarded."

Authorities in Ouagadougou report that:
a) the initial investigation indicates that all passengers were alive and not falling when they boarded the aircraft, and
b) they are running short of vowels.

You Just Can't Make This Stuff Up...

Weiner's wounded wifey Huma thought "long and hard" about leaving her husband, the embattled NYC Mayoral nomination-seeking pervert Anthony Weiner, when his second round of Tweet junk posting hit the media.

Questions abound.

Why couldn't Huma use a different expression?  Something along the lines of "I thought long and lubriciously as my sinewy, soft, silky..."

Why couldn't Anthony use Facebook?

Why can't we bring back the old songs?

Let's all sing like the Weiner sings

Tweet Tweet Tweet Tweet Tweeeeeet

Let's flash our junk and see what it brings

Tweet Tweet Tweet Tweet Tweeeeeet

Can't help it, as kids we watched "Sing Along With Mitch" for years.
Gee, does anyone remember "It's Three O'Clock in the Morning"?

Where were we? Oh yeah. Headlines from the UK Daily Mail:

Huma 'thought long and hard about leaving' Weiner when he told her he 'relapsed' and started messaging other women but she decided to go ahead with mayoral race

• Anthony Weiner's wife appeared at a Tuesday press conference confirming that she knew that he messaged women after his resignation
• Friends say she was 'furious' when she first found out months ago
• She knew that he hadn't hit 'rock bottom' and thought the relapse was part of the healing process

Weiner informed his wife that he "relapsed."

Funny thing, whenever I locked up a guy for who felt he had to wave his wand to save the world, I never used the charge "Public Relapsing - 2nd Degree".

I never had a shocked parent tell me this: "He opened his coat, spread his legs and with both hands relapsed right in front of my kids' bus stop! Three times!".

If Weiner was a conservative, this conversation wouldn't be taking place. Conservatives don't have Phoenix-like resurrections to inflict on the voters after moral turpitude incidents. Their base does not suffer fools gladly..

I Too Have Been Drunk And Lonely

From the annals of the NY Post, we are treated to an explanation of why a television personality chose to send images of himself wearing nothing but a towel and a pair of glasses. Mercifully his naughty bits were concealed under a strategically positioned towel.

Geraldo Rivera attempted an explanation of his nearly naked self portrait on his syndicated radio show yesterday. In a nutshell, he said there was alcohol involved, that he had no one to talk to and he was amazed by his 70-year-old body.

Television personality Eric Bolling and former New York governor Eliot Spitzer called into Rivera’s show and tried to get to the bottom of the accidental twitpic.

Bolling asked, "Of all the people that should know better, it should be you. What were you thinking?"

Rivera explained, "There I was, 2:30 in the morning on Sunday morning. You know, I do the show Saturday night, I did a great show on black-on-black crime and race relations and the Trayvon Martin fallout and federal charges ... and I get home and there's no one to talk to, everyone's asleep.

I stopped drinking over thirty years ago. But up until then, whenever everyone was asleep and I had a taste or two under my belt - off came the clothes and my junk was stowed under a tastefully arrayed swatch of cotton. Then out came the Polaroid and in a few seconds I was looking for stamps, envelopes and my address book. There was just so much of me that I wanted to share.

“And you just sit around, I had a drink and, you know, I had taken that picture Saturday morning and I was looking at it, just going through and I said 'you know, I gotta tweet this thing. I look pretty good for a 70-year-old.'

I can't read this self-serving journalistic schlock anymore. This is an adult(?) male who craves attention and will do anything to get in the news, whether it's news or not. And this is not news.

Geraldo and Weiner should be forced to spend some time together in a prison cell exposing themselves to each other. Then we'll see just how amazing they think they are.

Wonder Weiner

Pssst! He sent me one too!

There's just no keeping a good Weiner down I guess. Does Huma keep a leash on that thing?

From Brietbart:

New York City mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner admitted on Tuesday to sending additional explicit photos and texts to a woman he met online _ correspondence she says began months after he resigned from Congress for similar behavior.

The allegation could severely test voters' willingness to forgive Weiner, who has said he spent the two years since the scandal trying to make things right with his wife and earn redemption.

Weiner, who resigned his House seat in June 2011 after acknowledging having sexual conversations with at least a half-dozen women, has been near the top of most mayoral polls since his late entry into the race this spring.

"I said that other texts and photos were likely to come out and today they have," said Weiner in a statement released by his campaign. "I want to again say that I am very sorry to anyone who was on the receiving end of these messages and the disruption this has caused."

Weiner did not say when the newly revealed exchanges occurred, but he said his behavior created "challenges in our marriage that extended past my resignation."

The new lewd correspondence was posted Monday by the gossip website The Dirty. The woman involved was not identified.

I say, let the man embrace his inner Weiner! Cry Havoc and let slip the Weiner!

Elect this man, New York!

 Huma Taking Her Weiner For A Walk.

Elect him and let Anthony Weiner put the elasticity of men's briefs to the test for New York!
Let the Hanes howl!
Make Jockey fall off that horse!
Lower the Boom on Fruit of the Loom!
Mayor Bloomberg introduced the Nanny City, let Mayor Weiner make it the Banana City!

Huma is writing a book, "The Care and Feeding of Your Weiner."