September 20, 2010
Great Cause for Celebration ... Go Get the Bubbly
In case you have yet to hear, some one announced (I think it was some group of lefty pointy-heads) today that the recession is over!! Hallelujah!! We can all breathe easier. Whew ... for a while there I thought the economy was bad.
Also, it appears that this danged thing ended about a year ago (June '09) ... just slipped right out the door. Very shy, these recessions, it seems.
"But hey, if it ended then before any stimulus was spent at all, then Obama had nothing to do with curing the Recession, and in fact, his policies have only exacerbated the problem," you say?
SILENCE!!! We will have no more such blasphemy.
Times are good, you rubes! Don't you know?!!
My conclusion? I think that in the same way the Obama ended Global Warming by his mere presence in office (note how he caused the Global Climate Research Unit to implode and admit that their data was cooked ... at least that's what the BRITISH PRESS reported ... but I digress), brought the country together (Beer Summits), made the Iranians respect us and stop aggression (nice nukes, Ahmadinejad) stopped partisan rancor (i.e., passing Healthcare "Reform" with no Republicans) turned 8 (as in unemployment won't rise higher than 8 percent after this nifty Stimulus Bill) into 10, and raised, I mean, cut middle-class taxes ...
Wait, you didn't get your check? Just because you have yet to receive any money doesn't mean you don't have it, or that it's not on the way.
It's in the mail with the letter decreeing the Recession is over.
YOU UNGRATEFUL BASTARDS!!!!!
So, let's celebrate a little early Thanksgiving and spend that IMAGINARY TAX CUT celebrating this IMAGINARY END TO OBAMA'S RECESSION ... on Nov. 2 at the polls.
See you there.