Fenway Park Is Melting In The Dark

From Townhall:

Coakley’s Top Ten
by Jillian Bandes
Here are ten things you should know about Democrat Martha Coakley going into Tuesday’s Massachusetts Senate election.

1. She stated explicitly that pro-life Catholics shouldn’t work in the medical professions; in other words, Catholics have no right to act upon their conscience while performing their jobs. That’s a clear violation of freedom of religion. In Coakley’s words: “You can have religious freedom but you probably shouldn’t work in the emergency room.”

This woman must have a breathing coach, she is too stupid to remember how to do it herself. Can you imagine the outrage if Scott Brown had said that atheists shouldn't work in public safety (fire, police) or education?

2. She stated explicitly that she doesn’t believe there are any more terrorists in Afghanistan: “The mission in Afghanistan was to go in because we believed that the Taliban was giving harbor to terrorists… they’re gone. They’re not there any ore.”

Somewhere there is a fallopian tube that deeply regrets having rolled an egg into a uterus. That tube belongs to Coakley's mother. Sending terrorists to Afghanistan is like sending gay activists to San Francisco.

3. She stated explicitly that obtaining endorsements from Democratic politicos are more important than winning the support from the actual constituents of Massachusetts. Coakley angrily said political endorsements were preferable to “standing outside Fenway Park, in the cold, shaking hands” – precisely what her opponent, Republican Scott Brown, was doing.

But it is not preferable to standing outside mens' restrooms in Fenway Park, in the cold, offering yourself for half-eaten hotdogs, which is what she'll be doing after Tuesday.

4. The same statement revealed that she was unaware of the importance of Fenway Park, and the Boston Red Sox, to the people of Boston, the most important city in the state. Boston is perhaps most well known for the dedication of its fans to both the ballpark and its team.

Fenway Park mens' restrooms are on the Main and Lower Concourses: Left Field Grandstand, Gate C, Gate D Concourse, Gate E, Infield Concourse, Main Concourse, Right Field Boxes, Absolut Clubhouse. Premium seating restrooms - high class seating - Coakley will not be allowed there.

5. Her campaign aide (an Obama presidential appointee) roughed up a reporter during a campaign event. Coakley claimed to not have seen the incident, despite a photo that was published later on showing that she stared directly at the reporter while he was on the ground. She still refuses to apologize or even condemn the action taken by her staff.

Coakley's campaign aides were provided training by the SEIU Political Action Education and Persuasion Committee. Their motto: "Teach Them 'Til They Bleed Then Teach Them Some More."

6. While a District Attorney, Coakley lobbied for the conviction of a mother, daughter and son trio on charges of child abuse, despite no actual evidence of the crimes occurring, and using only coerced testimony from young children. She was also more lenient on the mother and daughter, because such crimes are “usually” the result of “a primary male offender."

Evidence? Evidence? We Don't Need No Steenking Evidence. We can feel a verdict.

7. She’s using the late Sen. Edward Kennedy’s memory to raise campaign cash, earning over a million dollars by appeals from Kennedy’s widow. Meanwhile, her opponent, Republican Scott Brown, has earned nearly the same amount simply by appealing to the hearts and minds of Republicans in Massachusetts and across the nation.

That's okay. Ted "Is It Still Dripping?" Kennedy had a lousy memory anyway. He was famous for forgetting where he left his secretaries. At least with Coakley, Vicki won't have to avoid stumbling on all those empty bottles.

8. She’s relying on President Obama to campaign for her during the eleventh hour, despite kicking her feet up the other three months of her campaign – apparently because she thought Massachusetts voters would blindly vote for whatever Democrat was thrown in front of their faces.

Doctor's orders: she had to keep off her feet as a treatment for Varicose Incompetency.

9. She’s an outspoken advocate of the health reform bill which, in it’s latest iteration, will exclude union members and government workers from taxes on health insurance plans while taxing other classes of Americans; this will further incentivize union membership and funding of Democratic candidates.

This just pisses me off to no end. Really, this is nothing but shameless shilling, backroom scheming and thuggery and larceny. I want to dig up all her dead relatives and slap them. Then go after the living.

10. She will provide the crucial 60th vote for Senate Democrats, allowing them to maintain the Democratic supermajority, and pass health care.

It is my fervent wish that passing any healthcare legislation resembles passing a kidney stone for these CLOWNS. Get rid of them, every one, starting with Coakley.

UPDATE:
Obozo gets heckled in Boston rally for Coakley.
He doesn't want the truth, he can't handle it ... or hecklers.

Wassa matter? No teleprompter?